Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Up up and away, my beautiful baffoon.

Monday morning, 9 am the phone rings and wakes me up. Strangely it is the third time this week, this week meaning last, at 9 am a person has called to wake me up. The same person, the electrician I've hired to work on the bar. "Good morning, are we going to finish the work today?" he asked. In my finest Keith Richards morning voice I simply said "no", I explained I only had four hours left to pack and run errands before my plane to Missouri left( the plane ride is a hell of a story that I will share later, it involves a man and his dog and that spoke through him by writing words with his nose on the palm of his hand. Oh ya' the dog was stuffed). He then became very sheepish and stumbled through the question, "..did I, uh... well um.. did I happen to call you at about 2:30 this morning?". I started laughing because, indeed, he had. Two-thirty, just a couple hours prior to the conversation we were having now, the phone at the bar rang. I was finishing up my bartending duties and prepairing to face, count and paperclip all of the green when my barback hands me the phone and says,"it's a boy, oooohhhh". "Hi, hhouww aRe yeou?". I didn't recognize this drunken voice, "who are you?", I said matter of factly. "It's me Adam, are we werging tomorrwww?", I said I didn't know. "I had a realnice tiame with you yesstur...day.". He was referring to the previous day when he came in to fix our shotty wiring. I occasionally came out of the office to ask how he was, or if he wanted something to drink like a soda or juice or something, you know the fun stuff. He babbled some more nonsense about liking me, I was counting money, and at some point he either passed out or hung up. I hung the phone up and thought to myself, hmmm the electrician is calling me in the middle of the night drunk... ok.
The next morning on the phone I said, "Ya' you called last night, but don't worry... you were just asking if I wanted to finish the work today, it was harmless". He seemed relieved. After I told him we weren't finishing the work he told me to have a great Christmas, to travel safe, and to call him as soon as I got home. I agreed then hung up the phone.
I sat on my front porch drinking coffee and smoking cig's for the next couple of hours, until I had 1 hour to prepare for my trip. The gun was shot, and they are off! Winky races through the front door right past here friend Andi. Andi turns, she races past Winky and tears open the travel bag. Winky panics, oh is she going to be able to execute this, oh! She does she pulls her self together by grabbing an armfull of cloths and cramming it in the bag. Andi comes up from behind and, woah.. she's got the makeup and shower products. She turns, fakes a left, and squeezes around the right side of Winky. She shoots... SHE SCORES, right in the travel bag. The croud, meaning my cat, goes wild. Just under the buzzer Winky packs her bag.
I'm in Mo-town now at my brothers, my brother 'Sue's', computer and everyone keeps hanging around the office door making small conversation. I think they want me to not be in here, so I will tell 'The Great Airplane Story' later. Tomorrow is a very dear friends birthday.... I can't wait.

3 comments:

Victoria said...

Wink! Ok your in Mo-town now, right? Which is not Missouri, but is Detroit? So I assume you still have one more airplane to board, which I hope is not with any other stuffed dogs or talking stuffed dogs or pilots talking to their stuffed dogs.. Can't wait to hear that story. And do travel safely, my dearest Winky. Oh! And open up your bag and realize that instead of clothes you grabbed a bunch of costumes from your one woman show. And some tu-tus. And a jar of sparkles (but you would have packed that anyway), and your hello kitty costume, and your Oscar the grouch costume. But I know that you will pull it off! Miss you! Love you! Merry Christmas my Winky-poo!
Love, Victoria

Victoria said...

Winky! I miss you!

Winky Stanofowick said...

The funny thing is when I did open my bag for the first time I had indeed grabbed a few costumes by mistake. It was a rare Christmas. I had also seemed to only pack one sock of each sock pair, and two leg warmers... not matching, and one shoe without shoelaces, and no underwear. I bought some new, and the night before I left I washed most everything I brought and left them all in his dryer in Missouri, or Michigan, or where ever it was that I visited. You know one day of my vacation I ate 8 pieces of lasagna, 4 cookies, a piece of cake, some candy, and a sandwich. I now can only move by conveyor belt or lazy Susan.